Losses, but mostly gains.. the end.

 

 

 

For me the Hudson River will always mean home.

 

 

This is the final installment in my Escape from Florida series. From here on out this blog will revert back to all things genealogy and history.  Our regularly scheduled programming as it were. 

 

We for the most part are happy to be back in the Hudson Valley. There is so much we have missed. Kids are growing, things look so different and there is so much new to explore, see and do.  

 

Our condo in Florida is still there. Construction is said to be completed in the fall. We can not go back. I can't live in fear of what to do if another storm comes, wonder where to go to keep my mother safe. Hoping we can get a handicapped equipped hotel room far enough inland. Leaving behind all that is precious to me and hoping the water doesn't rise and wash it all away. 

 

It's been a little over six months now and we are adjusting to our new normal.  Sometimes it surprises me. I no longer live in Florida. All the routines I have established there with work and mom and friends are gone. They are being replaced by new ones. I am learning where things are and how to get from point A to point B and its not as faraway and scary as I once thought. 

 

The people at our new place are friendly and helpful. Our savings, while dwindling is carrying us through. I will have a full time job soon and the fear of not having one is replaced by the fear of having one while have to care for my mom. And the fear of not having time for me and of course my research.  

 

The worst thing that has happened through all of this was the loss of our Millie. Our neighbor and friend, a force of nature. I thought she would outlive all of us. She is not the only person to pass away since we had to leave the condos. This disaster is responsible for other deaths too. 

 

Millie and her family are like our own family. I can't imagine living at the condo without Millie.  

 

My mom's health continues to ebb and flow. We have our good days and some bad ones. She hasn't be hospitalized since early February. We have great doctors and had excellent home nurses and therapists to support, care and educate us both.  

 

The long winter of adjusting to life here in Orange County, NY is over.  It it summer outside and my mom loves sitting on our patio, surrounded by her plants, the sun on her face. She has been through a lot and her tenacity amazes me.  She wants to walk and be independent, I just don't know if her body will cooperate. 

 

Being here with family and seeing them regularly has been good for her. She has felt the loss of Millie, even though we were not living close by anymore. Getting old is not easy.  

 

And I wanted to be here. There was no question where we were going to go when we learned we couldn't stay in Florida. And yet, there are things, places and people I miss. 

 

We would get in the car, me, mom and Millie and go to a place Tarpon Turtle, Grandma Sally's just in the spur of the moment. 

 

My work at ELCL. There is something to be said for being confident in your job and doing good work. That feeling of accomplishment when you make a list of things to do and get it all done.

 

I learned so much. About building a team, picking your battles and getting along with everyone. I miss my little library. It is a lot better than when I found it and I contributed to that. I am proud of that.

 

 I miss the patrons and most off all I miss my team. I was so lonely when I first moved to Florida and I did make friends, great ones. I feel disconnected no longer being part of their every day lives.  We all need to grow and I will work to stay in touch with  

 

For ages, in Florida I made plans. When I live in NY I will.....visit all the libraries, churches, cemeteries. All the research I couldn't do from a distance will finally get done. Well now I am here and still unable to just jump in my car and go.  I have to tell myself to be patient. There will be time. Years even.  You are home now and things will fall into place in time.